Linguistic Paranoia

Now, I know for a fact that two of my three schools absolutely love me, but the third…I am not sure.  Sometimes they are friendly, sometimes apathetic, sometimes I think I hear my name mentioned in an angry-sounding conversation.  It makes me paranoid.

This particular school has a rather negative feel, in general.  All the teachers hate the new principal, and everybody seems unhappy and angry.  This trickles down to the students, who end up disliking the stressed teachers, and this sometimes results in them having anger-management problems.

They have group discussions here in the office every day, and they never sound happy.  They always sound angry, or though there occasional moments of neutral-ness.  I always worry that they are talking about me, even though I don’t really have anything to worry about.  It’s hard to get teachers for rural areas like this, and 2 of my 3 schools like me, so the opinion of this one, even though it’s the one that pays me, would get overridden.  The fact that there’s a Korean word that sounds similar to my name (they say my name “Kelshee” and there’s a word that sounds like “Kayshee”) doesn’t exactly help with my paranoia.

Bleh.  Most of the time the language barrier doesn’t really bother me, but this is definitely one time that it does.  I hate not knowing if people are talking about me or not, and if they are, what about.  One of the schools I used to teach at used to talk about me all the time (though they tried to hide it by referring to me as “the American”, because they didn’t realize I know that word), and it drove me insane, because when I would ask what they were saying, they’d deny it.  Very frustrating, and just a little bit immature.


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October 2008
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